Here’s what I know about the NFL after three great action-packed weeks….
ITEM: This Favre kid? Up in the Bay of Greenness? He’s gonna work out okay after all. I was headed up to Historic Lambeau Field (gotta include the “Historic” in there, dontcha kinda gotta?) to see the game, but I missed my plane, thanks to a late driver and an insanely long line at my local Starbuck’s Coffee establishment. The airport was nuts with delays and cancellations, the actual flight up to Green Bay was a cattle car, and by the time I finally landed there was nothing I could do except watch the game on TV at the airport. But one heck of a game from the 37-years-young Favre, who tossed his NFL-record-tying 420th touchdown pass. Anyone wanna take me up on a bet that he throws at least one more touchdown? Anyone? Bueller?
ITEM: I highly recommend the TD Brat at the Austin Straubel International Airport, and the whole gang at Curly’s Sports Bar there. I know that wolfing down a bratwurst piled high with cheese and condiments doesn’t exactly fit in with anyone’s diet plans…but two or three of those babies sure help take the edge off when you’ve been in Airport Lambeau — oops, I mean Limbo. I would especially like to thank my waitress, the lovely Jessica Phu, who helped keep the cold ones coming.
ITEM: Did you know that Green Bay is home to an increasingly large Hmong population? Hmong, it turns out, are one of the many people of Southeast Asia who have found a happy home right here in the U.S.A. I learned all this from Jessica, who out of the goodness of her heart stayed to talk with me after the game. More fun facts about the Hmong people? Well, they do not really have a traditional written language, because they communicate primarily through art and the oral tradition. Interesting, huh? After the game, I hoped to learn more about this “oral tradition” thing by accepting Jessica’s invitation to visit her at her apartment. What I learned there was…well, let’s get back to football, shall we?
ITEM: LaDanian Tomlinson is a whiner and a baby, but really it looked like there was nothing he could do against Nick Barnett and the swarming green horde that is the Packers’ defense. Something’s going on in Green Bay…and I think I like it.
ITEM: Turns out that Donovan McNabb ain’t too shabby either, huh? Boy, our Walter Mercado really blew it on that one. Of course, it would have helped if Detroit had actually shown up to the game. Which they didn’t. I mean, they were there, but they weren’t really there, if you catch my drift. What I’m saying is, they played very poorly. Probably why they lost.
ITEM: Watching the New England / Buffalo game on SportsCenter (Jessica — or rather her family, they all live together in a charmingly cramped bungalow near the lake — has a great Panasonic large-screen TV), it was clear that the Patriots are the best team in the NFL. I’m not really sure why anyone else even tries. They will definitely go to the Super Bowl this year and most likely win the whole thing, unless there is some kind of Belichek Meltdown Situation. Which could happen. Anyone remember a little video incident thingie? Not after the Patriots’ dismantling of the Bills, they don’t.
ITEM: Hmong people are very family oriented. Her great-grandmother, whose name I didn’t quite catch so I just called her Granny, was a charming, spritely lady with a penchant for country music and sweet-smelling cigars. Jessica’s younger brother Jimmy showed me some of his hottest breakdance moves, and her older brother, Heavy, had some of the most extensive tattoo work I’ve ever seen on a young man. Of course, there was a lot to work with — Heavy was only about 5’7″ but I’m pretty sure he can bench-press more than 350 pounds, and displayed a facility with at least three different kinds of mixed martial arts. He demonstrated these techniques after a slight misunderstanding about my intentions with Jessica, which I blame on a language gap and on my fourth Leinenkugel of the afternoon.
ITEM: You know who’s almost as helpful and cheery as the staff at Curly’s? The emergency room technicians at St. Vincent’s Hospital. Not only do they re-set one heck of a dislocated jawbone, they also brew pretty good coffee, even if it does have to be iced down so it can be sucked through a straw. Special shout-outs to Marge, LaHelen, and Indira!
Peter King is a senior editor at Sports Illustrated, and has written a lot of books.