Hello to you all, it has been a long time since I write on this weblog called Yard Work! Actually, if you know the truth of things, I have written many other things, but these guys who do the weblog hads lost my writings very numerous times. We have a saying for this in Venezuela: “Los ganadores consiguen puestos, las computadoras del uso de los perdedores.” I will not translate that for you as it is a little naughty.

And a little naughty is how I feel! Let us face the music, my home country of birth is on a amazing roll right now. After the festival of love for Mr. Abreu at the Home Run Derby, with our beautiful flag overywhere, and after mi Tio Ozzie winning the World Series singlehandedly almost, and after Luiz “Cheeks of Sweetness” Gonzalez helped us win our first Caribbean Series since 1989, and further the humiliates doled out by Hugo Chávez against Georgie Mr. Danger Bush, you might think that we are imbeatable as a country right now.

The truth is, that is far from being the truth. There are still eproblems in my land, it is sad to say. We have a much poverty in the slum village, I am told; my newspaper, El Nacional, has a reports on that triste situación that I can read at some moments. Also, we have some issue with people being not educationed, feuds with other countrys, and also there has not been a good pop song here in months. So do not think, despite the amazing weather and our many beauty queens and our large stock of crude oil, that we live in a shangrila or paradise world!

Yet, let’s turn away from talking about sad. How about happy and excited! Like we all are about this Worlds Beisbol Classic. I think it would be a silly mistake for people to not think about us as the winners potential. Look at our esquad if you dont believe me. We here are scornful at Alex Cabrera, who is whining and crying like a baby left in the middle of the forest because he did not get a guaranty spot at first base, so he go to play in Japan; this is non-manly conduct, and I will not call him anysmore.

But come on: do you really think that anyone else can hold up to us? Dominican? Haha, make me laugh some more, my sides are not yet split up to my neck. Puerto Rico? Uhm, no. And let us not even bring up the spectre of the United States, because I am loath to make you my readers feel too badly. But your roster is mostly what men look at on the beach at Playa Medina, and I leave this to your healthy imaginacion. But quickly here is a jokes that we tell here: Why did the echicken cross the road? Because he didnot know if he should play for Dominican or the EEUU in the Worlds Beisbol Classic! There are some more but I cannot prints them in a family weblog like this.

So, I do not want to tempt fate. To quote another proverb, “Él sodomizan los que tientan a sino a menudo.” But it is all quite claro that the stars are stacking up in alignment for my countryfolk in the WBC. The only team we fear is Japan, if I am being honest with you, and I always am. And I wouldn’t be surprised at all if the Cuban team turns out to be just as good as any of the other teams which that will losing to us. (We are, how you say, very friendly with that team. Hush the word.) But the proof is in the puding, and if we play bad then we will lose, just like in beisbol everywhere. Maybe you have a chance after all!

JAJA I DO NOT THINKS SO.

Ana Maria Callejeo Guillen is the top baseball writer for El Nacional. Her new self-help book, “Strive for Excellence in the Way of Ana Maria Callejeo Guillen!” is available wherever fine books are sold.