“Teh Bonds Age”: A Look Back

Many units have immed Unit 7280856453 to ask about a very interesting time in hu-man baseball history. This time is now known as Teh Bonds Age. It was dominated by one hu-man, Barry Bonds, a unit with an uncanny knack for hitting home runs. Bonds at one point held teh single-season record with 73 home […]

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Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!

Look alive, Junior – I’m Izzy Mandelbaum, personal trainer to the stars, and I’m here to talk to you tubby turkies about physical fitness. You might remember me sticking it to that no-talent chucklehead Jerry Seinfeld. Now I’m sticking it to Major League Baseball, and they never had it so good. See that picture up […]

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Pain Lies on the (Ohio) Riverside

I was totally bummed when I got traded to the Reds, dude. Totally bummed. I mean, let’s face it: Boston is a Bronson Arroyo kind of town. Cool temperatures, hot co-eds, a real laid-back clubhouse. I could grow my hair out, maybe mix in some cornrows here and there if I wanted to let my […]

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YARD WORK EXCLUSIVE: Adam Dowdy Apologizes

Dear Baseball: I would like to publically apologize for what I am being blamed for by Mr. Steinbrenner for throwing out both managers in Sunday’s important Blue Jays / Yankees game. I realize that these games in April are of great importance to both teams especialy the Yankees who need every win they can get […]

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The New Mr. Majestyk

I don’t know if you folks have been paying attention to the calendar, but it was one year ago today that I kicked off this whole Yard Work thing. We’ve come a long way since that E$PN-sponsored Blogspot site, and I’d just like to take the opportunity to thank everyone that’s written for us, and […]

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Bowden Variations

“I’ve had plenty of e-mails from fans suggesting if we had an owner we could have kept Esteban Loaiza and signed A.J. Burnett, Kevin Millwood and/or Jarrod Washburn. So, for a mere $35 million for this year alone, you could have had a starting pitching rotation that is a combined 2-9.” – Jim Bowden, The […]

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A Good Ribbing

People are giving Mets announcer Keith Hernandez a hard time for telling it like it is about a supposedly sensitive issue. Earlier this week, Keith spoke up about what he saw as a wrong thing. During a game against the Padres, Keith noticed a woman in a Padres uniform giving Mike Piazza a high-five. “Who […]

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Yard Work Fantasy Draft Scuttlebutt

Okay, you hosers can stop with all the emails now. “Oh pleeeze Spart-Daddy, how did the YW draft go, I have to know, OMG WTF LOL” You know I never comment on a draft until three weeks after it happens, too much to take in all at once. Now that we’re out of the woods, […]

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What’s On Ozzie’s Mind? (April Win Streak Edition)

We’ve been winning a lot of games lately. This is a winning club. I prefer winning to losing, especially in April. If we win one more time then it’ll be nine in a row, which will be one more than the streak we had last October against LA and Houston. That might indicate that this […]

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Mea Culpa (with benefits)

I’m writing this to tell you I’m sorry. The people in the Padres organization deserve an explanation. As for the fans in Fort Wayne of the Midwest League, who came to the ballpark every night to cheer me on as I racked up save after save, I owe you all an explanation more than anyone. […]

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