¡Hola, bitches! I’m back like the body part your mom spends most of her time upon. The lame-o-nauts here at Jockitch (see what I did there) have green-lit my booty-kickin’ fantasy baseball column, as I knew they would. So sit down, shut up, put yr pants back on, and take it — just like yr […]
Continue reading →Dag, y’all, has this been a boring baseball season so far or what? Everything is falling into place, just as I thought it would. Utley and Hamilton, leading their leagues in tacos largos? CALLED IT, knew it, locked ’em both up with my first two picks in every league. Cliff Lee, best pitcher in the […]
Continue reading →Okay you weak-kneed lily-livered weenosauri, it’s go time. Specifically, it’s time for YOU to go — down, that is. To me. In fantasy baseball. Here’s the poop, garbage-eaters. We’re rocking a new kind of fantasy ball this year — any butt-reamin’ keanu can pick good players, but we’re after those who can select the worst […]
Continue reading →Spitballs and sweathogs. Player’s coffee and human growth hormone. Chunky groupies, resin bags, rally caps and a whole lot of penicillin. That’s what baseball writing is made of. Oh, and this year, add a tall glass of whine (see what I did there?), because a whole hayride of pasty-faced idjuts are going on and on […]
Continue reading →Okay, you hosers can stop with all the emails now. “Oh pleeeze Spart-Daddy, how did the YW draft go, I have to know, OMG WTF LOL” You know I never comment on a draft until three weeks after it happens, too much to take in all at once. Now that we’re out of the woods, […]
Continue reading →Spart-Daddy here. Listen, I asked some of the other people in the league to give me a brief write-up of who they are and how they plan to draft on Saturday morning. (We will also have a special secret guest or two but I am not going to tell you because that will make you […]
Continue reading →Okay, losers, here’s the deal. I’m back, and I know you missed me. I should do a whole thing here about “oh the new season” and “ah Opening Day is a national holiday” and all that shinola — but come on, it’s me, Spart-Dawgz, the only daddy that’ll walk the line. I keep it real […]
Continue reading →When we here at Yard Work found out that two of our contributing writers were starting a feud, we decided to get them together here at YW headquarters. Here, slightly edited, is part of that conversation. Ana Maria Callejeo Guillen: So, Spartacus, what did you think about World Series 2005? Spartacus: Well, Ana Maria, I […]
Continue reading →I hope you’re drinking something cool and have plenty of suntan lotion available, because, as you know by now, I totally burned you with my postseason picks article. By picking just about everything correctly, I think I’ve pretty much solidified my standing as The Only Pundit That Matters around here. (Notice that no one else […]
Continue reading →Listen up, you bunch of Krispy Kreme-eating civilians: THERE IS NO SUSPENSE LEFT in the season. All the playoff races are set, yo, they’re in da book, da book is shut and returned to the library and someone else has already checked it out. Wait — what? You don’t know how it’s all gonna turn […]
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