Welcome back to the Yard Work 2008 Season Preview. Every day or so, up until and past Opening Day, some person from some place will sound off on some team. In Part Two of our series, Arizona Senator (and presidential hopeful) John McCain talks about his home-state Diamondbacks, and being old.
As I’ve been touring this great nation of ours, speaking to the people about my interest and need in becoming the next President of these United States, many questions have been asked by the fine men and women I’ve had the pleasure to meet along the way. When will we get our tax refund checks? When will we invade another Arab nation? When will America build a large stone wall topped with barbed wire and sniper towers at our most vulnerable borders to prevent neighboring countries from flooding our fruited plains with dangerous alien immigrants? And, most importantly, what do you consider the most important qualification for a presidential candidate? The answer to that last question is, of course, experience.
To run a nation as great as the United States, you need perspective and wisdom, two things that you can only acquire via experience. I have served as the representative of Arizona’s 1st district for four years, and have proudly represented Arizona in the U.S. Senate for over twenty years. I have also served this country in times of war, including eight years as a Vietnamese POW. I have been the recipient of a Silver Star, a Bronze Star, the Legion of Merit, the Purple Heart, and the Distinguished Flying Cross. I have also been married two times. No matter what talents my honorable opponents may possess, and no matter whose influence they can sway, and no matter whose votes they might steal, all their experiences put together can’t hold a candle to what I’ve seen and heard throughout my 71 years of life.
Experience is also a needed component of other walks of life, including, of course, baseball. When the Diamondbacks franchise did Arizona proud with a World Series victory in the wake of the greatest tragedy America has ever seen, they did so atop the shoulders of two giants — pitchers Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling. Their everyday lineup was a virtual 21st century Murderer’s Row, featuring the bats of such fearsome competitors like Luis Gonzalez, Matt Williams, Mark Grace, and World Series hero Tony Womack. The one thing linking all these great players together? Experience.
Look at any recent baseball champion — the plucky Chicago White Sox featuring aged Cuban refugees Orlando Hernandez and Jose Contreras; the two-time champion Boston Red Sox of Tim Wakefield and (again) Curt Schilling; the underdog St. Louis Cardinals, powered by Jim Edmonds and So Taguchi. And who can forget the recent run of success had by the New York Yankees, thanks in large part to the wise old soul of captain Derek Jeter? Without the experience of these battle-tested professionals, these teams would be forgotten runners-up, unheralded anecdotes to some other team’s experience-driven championship run.
It’s because of experience that I fear for the direction of the Arizona Diamondbacks. After last year’s miraculous divisional championship (and less than noble NLDS sweep), many fans were hoping that the team would “reload” for 2008. Many experienced free agents were available to help the team achieve this goal this past offseason — dragon slayer Josh Fogg, sparkplug David Eckstein, and even former D-Back great Luis Gonzalez. Instead, the front office — headed by inexperienced GM Josh Byrnes, might I add — made a move to acquire an unproven starting pitcher, Oakland A’s hurler Dan Haren. An opportunity lost, to be sure.
Even with the hopeful return of Randy “Big Unit” Johnson to the ranks of the un-disabled, I find it hard to see even his veteran leadership being able to smooth out the inevitable bumps that such a young and undependable rotation will (no pun intended) experience. Every time Haren or Brandon Webb takes the mound, or newly crowned closer Brandon Lyon (only 29!) comes in to shut the door, it will be hard to predict how well they’ll perform. Inconsistency is an unfortunate hallmark of youth, and it will be difficult for the team’s hitting line-up to contend with such tribulations when they have their own share of problems.
The days when you could rely on stalwart stewardship from professionals like Jay Bell and Steve Finley are a thing of the past. It will be up to offensive leader Eric Byrnes to carry the weight this year, and there’s only so much his infectious hustle and unfettered moxie can accomplish. Byrnes can’t hit for kids like Justin Upton or Chad Tracy. Byrnes can’t steal bases in place of Chrises Young and Snyder. He won’t be able to score runs wearing a Stephen Drew or Orlando Hudson jersey. There’s only one athlete that could do all this, and his name is Bugs Bunny. And, unfortunately, he doesn’t exist.
I would like to offer hope to Diamondback Nation, just as my insistence to stay the course in Iraq no matter the cost brings hope to enemies of terror across our globe. But hope is in short supply in the BOB these days, as Byrnes and team president Derrick Hall have recently been awarded eight-year extensions. What this means for the future is more of the same: a reliance on unproven kids to buck trends and repeat exemplary performances, and a woeful lack of any true veteran experience. It’s a shame that such a noble franchise, only seven years removed from their first World Championship, will soon experience its darkest days. All I can offer in comfort to D-Backs Nation is that a vote for me in November will ensure that our triumphant country will never fall into such dire straits under my experienced watch. May God bless you, and may God bless America.